Ponderings of a Young Mother

Dear Audrey,

I agree with you that there is so little encouragement, teaching, and discipleship from older women to younger women but does that mean that every time an older woman encourages a younger woman by saying that the day is coming when there will be more to her life than diapers - is this wrong?

I think the better approach for the older woman would be to encourage the young woman that days of diapers are every bit as important as some imagined distant day in the future.  What if that distant day never comes?  We are not promised one more minute.  I would rather tell a young mom that diaper days are critical, crucial and very important work. 

A young mother should be told that diapering is ministry - see, a woman's perspective needs to be adjusted rather than promising that some future day out there that supposedly is better.   Even though older women don't mean to, they are sending the message that life with diapers is a nothing life.  God knew what He was doing when Mary's older woman, Elizabeth, was diapering at the same time as she was.  They were both doing kingdom work right then and there - not just preparing for the day when Jesus and John could be released and they could pursue other things.  In fact we see Mary all throughout the life of Jesus - up to the cross and then in the Upper Room at Pentecost.  Her mothering never ended.   And since she had other children, it is safe to assume that she had plenty of grandchildren to diaper as she became the older woman of her generation.  

Somehow we've got to get past the thinking that the only kingdom work is the big time or girlfriend time.  While Mary mothered Jesus - it was quiet - but it was kingdom work.  Only one young mother raised THE SAVIOR, but all the others who have raised children are raising little men and women to be used of God in this wicked and perverse generation.  None of us would have ever told Mary that "her day" was coming while she had the privilege of changing the diaper of Jesus.

And while we're speaking of diapers - what's wrong with that anyway?  What's wrong with rocking and cuddling and answering 100+ questions, and wiping snotty noses, cleaning up throw-up, and playing blocks on the floor?  This is kingdom work.  And it's not just something to get through so you can get on to something bigger.  This is big.

Can't we have older women helping us to learn our jobs as mothers and giving us hope that one day we will have the option of doing other things as the Lord leads?

What other things are you speaking of?  See, as a woman grows and learns her job as a mother - there will be a whole new generation of young mothers who need be taught and it is the older woman's job to teach, encourage, and train them. 

Still, your question sounds as though raising children is just something to get through and "hope for that one day when we will have the option of doing other things."  I personally don't ever want to get rusty in mothering.  All my children are grown now - I'm still their mother - and I pray for them EVERY DAY.  And now that I'm a grandmother?  I'm realizing even more that my mothering will never be over or finished till God takes me home or Jesus comes backs for His church.  Whichever comes first, I want to finish my assignment focused.  I want to give my all, as God enables me, to my daughter, my daughters-in-law - I want to be all there for them, to help them navigate all the things life throws at them.  I want to be an encourager, a teacher of good things, always always pointing them to God, who is faithful.   This is not a time in my life to get lazy about God's assignment for women.

There's a whole new generation of little women growing up and I'm still here . . .